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now_ish What are these tears upon your face? - Just when I thought I reached the bottom..
.. I'm dying again.
now_ish What are these tears upon your face?

It's almost like you merely blink. One minute you feel the world slipping away from the very tip of your fingers and the next thing you know the entire world just crashes back into you completely. I could feel every nerve and sense rush back to life with blinding speed, causing a shakened gasp that was unneeded to the dead lungs my corpse now carried. My sight, once greeted by the comfort blanket of darkness was now surrounded by a blinding light that I had to wait moments for it to adjust to before I could take a look where I was at. This place, I know this place.. memories, all of it, were coming back to me slowly piece by piece.

My body shot up forcefully without consent as I heaved out breaths, my nails digging into the hard cool surface I was laying down upon. I see them now, my mind was now acknowledging their faces when everything came together. William the Bloody, Drusilla, and who's this tattered boy? I don't recognize his face but I know the smell of a kindred -- yes, I could feel every part of me that was long dead come alive again.

Every one of my family was here to greet me -- greet the one who gave the reason on why they were here in the first place. Except one, of course.. well, it's always been this way. Doesn't matter how many times I came back, he'll never be around. Had to learn to give up on that boy..

"She's no threat to you. Never really was."

It took longer than I thought before memories from her started clicking in. Angelus.. it wasn't Angel who was speaking to me, it was Angelus. And I was thrown, disregarded from him as if I was nothing. 150 years of being together and he treated me like nothing? It was William who saved me, William and Drusilla.. not Angelus. He didn't return the favor. The anger within me boiled.. it's because of that brunette whore. He wants to play this way then..

Why do you weep?
What are these tears upon your face?

I closed my eyes when I was greeted with flashes of my last moments. It was being being played to me like a movie in fast forward, all the fears and emotions that soul carried now being left behind in me. Lindsey's tears, the regret of never seeing Connor.. all of it. I didn't want to be here, didn't ask for it -- no! I do want to be here. It's that bitterness, the bitterness of the filthy soul! Always has to leave such a rotten taste in my mouth every time!

Taste. I could taste it. The blood from William the Bloody and something else. Something fresh and sweet. I had enough of this! All of this! I just wanted all of it to go away! I needed a kill. Within a flash I up on my feet with the unfamiliar vampire directly front of me and I growled. Get out of my way. My hand shot forward to grip onto his neck tightly to only shove him aside with my new found strength.. must feed..

It was the only way to make these feelings go away.

Current Mood: angry angry